During a BDSM session, the body of the submissive releases a whole lot of hormones that might make them enter what’s called “subspace“. Subspace is a mental state that feels like a high, and that can lead to the sub feeling confused, slow, and having a higher tolerance to pain, among other things. But everything that goes up, goes down, and in this case there’s no exception. Subspace is often followed by subdrop, a state of mental, physical and emotional depression. In this article, I will tell you what is subdrop and how to deal with it.
What is subdrop?
Subdrop is a mental, emotional and physical state a submissive enters after a BDSM session, in which they become notably sensitive, and in some cases insecure and even depressed. Other symptoms of subdrop that one may present are fatigue, confusion, a feeling of guilt and insomnia. There are some cases in which the sub also presents symptoms similar to those of a cold. It can lasts from hours to weeks.
Subdrop is caused by the hormones the body releases during a session. Those hormones (dopaminesm, endorphins, adrenaline…) lead the submissive to entering subspace, and once that “high” goes away, this is what comes next. Because what goes up, eventually goes down.
Not everyone experiences subdrop the same way. And, there’s people who never experience it, as well as people who rarely do. What seems to be a fact, is that very few people experience it every time they have a play session.
How to deal with subdrop?
All dominants and submissives should know how to deal with subdrop to control and relieve its symptoms.
- Be aware of what’s happening. A basic aspect to deal with subdrop is being aware of the fact that what we are experiencing is a subdrop. Knowing that it’s normal and natural. And, that there really isn’t nothing wrong with us and that we haven’t done anything wrong.
- Keep an aftercare kit. An aftercare kit will help relieving the symptoms of a subdrop greatly, as it will provide us with things that will make us feel better. Those items can be anything that provides comfort and warmth. My personal aftercare kit is composed of painkillers, water, sweets, a comfy pajama, a warm blanket and Candy, a plushie that my Mistress suggested me getting for my kit and that’s just great for cuddling. Other items that can be included in an aftercare kit are scented candles, vitamins, a book, lotions…
- Communicate. It’s pretty clear that communication, in a D/S relationship, is key. And when dealing with subdrop, that’s not an exception. It’s important for the submissive to let the dominant know what they need whilst experiencing subdrop, whether it’s cuddles, being left alone or anything else, and to communicate everything they feel that they need to get out of themselves.
- Eat and drink. Eat something that will give you some energy, preferably meat, fish, vegetables or cheese, and drink to hydrate yourself. In this case, try to avoid fast food and coffee. It might be a good idea to have your meal prepared before starting the session.
- Take a hot bath or shower. A nice hot bath or shower will help you relax. And, being all clean and fresh always makes one feel better.